Freestyle Friday: Lose Pounds, Just Not Ratings or Endorsement Deals  

I thought about making a graph for every TV show I continue to watch in spite of its awfulness, but then I realized that could take a while. Not to mention the fact I'd also have to admit to watching programs that rank in quality somewhere beneath Dancing with the Stars, yet just above the one on Seattle public access where the guy twists his dick into funny shapes for half an hour.


(click image to enlarge)

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8 Reasons to Live

  • Ed  
    April 2, 2010 at 10:58 AM

    At least you have a plan.

    That's always the first step towards failure.

    I mean success.

  • Logical Libby  
    April 2, 2010 at 11:15 AM

    I like "the windsurfer."Oh, oh, and "the mushroom."

  • Graygrrrl  
    April 2, 2010 at 12:19 PM

    Why can'we have awesome, mildly disturbing penis related public access shows in Texas? Damned Republicans...

  • Jennifer  
    April 2, 2010 at 12:23 PM

    I don't even watch television and I could club Jillian Michaels with a baby seal.

  • Fat Sparrow  
    April 2, 2010 at 12:39 PM

    "every TV show I continue to watch in spite of its awfulness"

    I have to say that one of the bonuses of living here with my folks is that the Spouse Sparrow can't watch the Saturday night made-for-TV-movie SciFi Channel shitefest anymore.

    And while I have not seen that TV show, I'm sure your graph is dead on. Every person I've ever known who has had that lap-band surgery (4 of them!) never even tried to exercise beforehand. Good grief.

  • Lizzle  
    April 7, 2010 at 10:49 AM

    Funny, my weight loss plan consists almost entirely of the two lowest-priority tasks... Guess that's why I'm not dropping 200 lbs in 3 months...

    Or it could be because I don't have 200 lbs to lose... and I have to go to work all day instead of having all day to work out, and cry on camera about how tough it is to be fat... Nah, couldn't be that! I need to go get those crucial biggest loser items immediately and step up my subway and yoplait consumption!

  • Toe  
    April 7, 2010 at 12:32 PM

    This graph is awesome. I think you might be on to something here. I'm sure that Fitpro Plus I just bought at 2am from that info commercial is really going to pay off.

  • Gillian  
    April 8, 2010 at 12:46 PM

    I can't believe you forgot "Chew Crappy Extra Sugar Free Gum to Stop Your Cravings for Dessert As If That Will Actually Work" and "Put Your Food In Ziploc Bags In Case You Never Thought of That" and "Burn Calories By Alienating Everyone on the Show".

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